That’s my story and I’m sticking to it…

first day of school 2010

My daughter starts her senior year in high school tomorrow. As she pulls out of the drive in a cloud of dust I will have my hand in the air and a smile on my face. Not a tear will fall.

Before she goes I will give her a hug take our “first day of school” photo, and tell her to have a great day. Not a tear will fall.

I’m not going to picture her so many years before (that seem like yesterday) bouncing down the hall ready to start her school years in the “big school” her brother went to. I won’t see her
smiling and waving me away, when I tell her to have a great day. Not a tear will fall.

I’m not going to find myself-after she’s gone- looking through her pictures on the shelf. There, as her one year old self, dressed in the dress my grandma made me when I was that age. Not a tear will fall.

I’m not going to stand there on senior night for her swim team thinking back to her first lessons, seeing her as she begs me to let her jump off the high dive. I finally relented and walked her out to the edge. She jumped off-laughing all the way. I turned and climbed down. Not a tear will fall on that day.

I won’t see her all dressed up eager to cross the stage in her paper-made hat on her Kindergarten graduation day; as she steps across the stage again in May. I will only see the lovely amazing young woman she has become, and feel the pride and anticipation of what is still to come. Not a tear will fall.

I will not think about her leaving this time next year, and going excitedly into the world on her own. I won’t warn the world to watch out- Hadley is on her way. She will accomplish amazing things, be an amazing women, a beautiful girl inside and out. She already is. Not a tear will fall.

I will not think about the days gone by, or miss the times we’ve shared. I will not picture her in my
arms, or at age eleven standing taller than me. I won’t see the way she’d grab her grandpa’s hand at two and lead him along (sometimes into doors, he was blind) saying “come on papa, cookie.”  won’t picture her trailing after her brother determined to do everything he could do. Not a tear will fall.

I’ll only see our girl on her way to start of her senior year, full of hope and determination to make this a great year. Not a tear will fall.

As the song goes-that’s my story and I’m sticking to it! Not a tear will fall…..

Yeah, probably not.

 

age 1

16 years

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4 responses to this post.

  1. My youngest is out of high school 9 years now, but I remember his senior year as if it were yesterday. While I was excited for him, I wondered what I would do when there were no more kiddos at home. Everything we went to I thought, “This is the last time…” It’s a hard, but exciting time for everyone. Enjoy the moments–and find time alone for a tear or two.

    Reply

  2. Posted by Michelle on August 10, 2011 at 1:40 am

    Not a tear will fall?? I can’t even imagine! I love how you reminisce about the years before about your daughter. Such a sweet post.

    Reply

  3. Wonderful memories of time, but it’s okay if the tears will fall. Take pride in a job well done!

    Reply

  4. Posted by Michelle on August 30, 2011 at 6:02 pm

    Tam… I can think of another country song that might fit at this time… White Liar! You said many of the things I was thinking a couple of weeks ago too! But then I remember something my mom told me when my oldest went off to pre school and told me you need to go now mom… “Motherhood is one of the few jobs in life that if you work hard and do a good job in the end they fire you!”

    Reply

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